Friendship
by perplexic
Summary: “Give me ten minutes Aburame.” Sasuke says lowly, glowering surreptitiously at the pair. “No, even five would work.” ShinoKiba and SasuNaru
1. Chapter 1

"Give me ten minutes Aburame." Sasuke says lowly, glowering surreptitiously at the pair. "No, even five would work."

Shino flips a page, eyes never leaving his _Encyclopedia of Parasitic Insects_. "How precisely would I go about doing that, pray tell?"

"Hell if I care!" The boy snaps irritably. "Just keep Kiba distracted so I can talk to Naruto!"

Shino sighs, hearing the smothered pleading under the petulance and starts flipping through the book for a particular article.

"What gives you the idea that Inuzuka would be even vaguely inclined to bare my company?"

Sasuke's voice is biting. "Are you memory impaired or just stupid? He spent the first three weeks of school trying to get you to so much as acknowledge his existence. He'd probably be thrilled."

"Was he?" Shino drones more out of social convention than genuine interest, eyes glancing up just long enough to catch the other boy's incredulous look.

He supposes that he owes Sasuke this much, considering how often they work and eat together.

Admittedly the other boy is more likely than not taking advantage of Shino's innate ability to make people ridiculously uncomfortable, so as to keep away some of his more overzealous admirers, but it's the principle of the thing. Besides, Sasuke is relatively pleasant company when he isn't convinced that the world is out to get him, and the closest thing to a best friend that Shino imagines he will ever have.

"Why in particular do you need Uzumaki alone? If you're just going to taunt him as per usual then Inuzuka's presence is irrelevant." Shino says finally, dog-earing the article labeled _Siphonaptera_. "Are you trying to confess or something?" He adds in a rare show of humor, though his tone hardly betrayed it.

Sasuke's posture goes utterly stiff. "How did you know?"

"What?" Shino says in disbelief, actually closing the book and looking him in the eye. The other boy's eyebrows furrow, but he relaxes slightly.

"You said—"

"I was joking."

Sasuke seems baffled.

Shino supposes that Sasuke has always seemed a little too preoccupied with the exuberant blond boy, even taking into account that most of it was arguments and mockery. But why he suddenly feels the need to confess to the fact in the middle of lunch is a beyond him.

He takes a quick scan of the area and it dawns on him. They're currently in the midst of Autumn, so the picnic area where they usually eat lunch is fairly deserted because of the cooler temperature. Aside from themselves and the pair in question, there are only two other groups of students (none of which are Sasuke's admirers he notes), and all of them are spread out among the numerous tables. Even if Uzumaki were to react violently there would be a minimum of witnesses, and most would probably assume it was just the two bickering again.

Uzumaki and Inuzuka are seated about fifteen feet from the cafeteria doors. There are usually a few others seated with them, though they are notably absent. The two seem undaunted by the fact and are laughing raucously, Inuzuka's arm slung over the other boy's shoulders in a show of natural camaraderie.

Upon reflection, it appears that it's jealously that Sasuke has been seething in, and not irritation as previously assumed.

Speaking of which it seems the other boy has finally put together the course of their most recent exchange and is glaring darkly.

"I swear to god Shino, if you—"

"Who would I tell?" He interrupts shortly and vaguely irritated, partially because Sasuke is trying to threaten him, and partially because the other boy thought even for a moment that he would be the type to gossip. "Look, I honestly couldn't care less about your romantic inclinations. Do what you will and I'll do what I can about Inuzuka." He says standing and gathering his books.

Shino swears that for a second Sasuke almost looks grateful, but he probably imagined it.

He walks over at a leisurely pace, Sasuke following and looking like there are so many better things he could be doing, as always.

Inuzuka is in the middle of telling a story as he approaches, jerking in surprise when Shino comes up behind him and sets a hand on his shoulder.

"Inuzuka, could you spare a moment?"

The boy blinks widely at him, seeming at a bit of a loss.

"…um …yeah..." Inuzuka gives him a small, confused smile. "Sure!"

Shino turns and starts walking in the direction of the cafeteria. In the reflection of the glass windows, he can see Inuzuka look hesitantly between himself and Uzumaki, the other boy urging him to follow. Inuzuka moves to join him after a moment of contemplation and Shino can already hear the _loser_s and _bastard_s flying as he enters the building.

"So…" Inuzuka says uncertainly beside him, scratching at one of the red triangles adorning his cheeks. "You wanted to talk to me…?"

"Yes." Shino replies flatly, continuing out of the cafeteria and into the hallways. "Your sister works at a veterinary clinic, correct?"

The other boy halts suddenly. "…What?"

"Your sister." He repeats impatiently. "She works at a veterinary clinic. Or perhaps I've been misinformed?"

Inuzuka shakes his head in something that resembles self-derision and starts to follow again.

"N-no, no, that's right. She's getting experience so one day she can start her own clinic eventually… Why do you ask?"

Shino opens up his book to the article he marked and passes it to the other boy.

"I've been considering doing a science fair project relating to fleas and other parasitic insects." He explains, finally stopping at his locker. "Her insight and possible cooperation would be highly beneficial should that be the case." Reaching in, he retrieves a piece of paper and pencil and hands it to him. "Could I have her number?"

Inuzuka looks from the book, to him, to his hand incredulously.

"Um…" The other boy hesitates for a moment, eyes searching they're surroundings as if in consideration. "You do realize how utterly creepy it would be to get a random call from someone, like, five years younger than you that you don't even know …right?"

"Would it? I didn't realize." Shino says unaffectedly. "What course of action would you propose then?"

Inuzuka starts scratching at his tattoo again. "Well I dunno… I guess I could ask her when she's free and then introduce you…?"

"I see. If it's not an inconvenience for you, I'll keep that in mind should the need arise." He says closing his locker again.

"Here." The other boy takes the previously offered piece of paper, jotting something down before handing it back in a way that almost seems embarrassed. "That's my number. I'm usually free to talk. You know, just in case you need to get in touch."

Shino nods his head in appreciation, folding and pocketing the paper before heading in the direction of his next class.

"Um…" Inuzuka starts nervously. "Was that… _all_ you wanted to talk about?"

"Yes." Shino replies simply, not even turning to look at him. It's been about eight minutes, and by the time the other boy reaches Uzumaki again, it will have been well over ten.

"Oh… 'kay. Guess I'll see ya around then." He calls after him, heading back towards the cafeteria.

* * *

Naruto is laughing his ass off and Kiba is sorely tempted to deck him once on principle alone, and then a few more times because of his sour mood.

"He asked for your _sister's_ number? God, you really know how to pick 'em Kiba! What is it with you and the freaks? First Kankuro and now some recluse with a sister complex!"

Kankuro had been an old boyfriend of his back when they had started high school, and while he had some _unorthodox_ hobbies, he was still a nice person. However, in the end they both mutually lost interest and decided to stay friends, but the guys still razz him about it despite the fact that Kankuro's not the perv or freak that rumor makes him out to be.

Kiba cuffs Naruto over the head. "Shut your damn mouth before I shut it for you. He only wanted it for some science fair thing because she's a vet!" Then after a moment. "And there's nothing wrong with Kankuro! He's a good guy!"

Naruto gives him an incredulous look. "Puppets Kiba, _puppets_. And don't even get me started on the make up."

"Says he who lusts after the guy with the eternal stick up his ass." Kiba retorts.

"Hey, hey! Didn't I just tell you I made some progress? This is _huge_!"

"He smiled at you Naruto." Kiba says dryly. "That's nothing. _I _gave Shino my number."

"For a _Science Fair_ _project_. That's pathetic." Naruto bites back.

"Fuck you! At least he doesn't hate my guts!"

"Yeah, well at least Sasuke actually _gives_ a flying fuck about me!"

"What part of _hating your guts_ isn't getting past that thick skull?"

"Hey! Love and hate are two sides of the same coin man! It's all about _passion_!"

"Are you retarded or something? That's the dumbest—!"

"Ladies, ladies. Keep your voices down would you?" Comes a monotone, drawling voice from behind them. "You two could give a deaf man a headache, I swear."

"Ah! Shikamaru! Chouji! Where have you been?" Naruto asks, all previous anger forgotten. "Lunch is almost over!"

Chouji swallows a bite of a sandwich he's munching on. "Mr. Umino was worried that Shikamaru had narco-something—" "Narcolepsy" Shikamaru interrupts. "—yeah that, and made him go to the nurse to get checked out."

Shikamaru sighs and slumps down lazily. "I guess it never occurred to him that his class is an utter drag. Who wouldn't fall asleep?"

"Watch it Shikamaru or teacher's pet over here might jump you." Kiba jeers.

"Screw you Kiba, Mr. Umino is amazing even if his lessons _are_ boring."

"Ah, speaking of teacher's pet—" Shikamaru starts tiredly.

"My Most Cherished Comrades! How fares your day?" Lee says exuberantly, returning from his daily laps around the school.

"Great! Sasuke actually smiled at me today!" Naruto says unabashedly.

"Oh! How excellent Naruto! I knew your Youthful Energy would someday melt his Icy Heart!"

"So how many laps was it today Lee, don't you have a game tomorrow?" Kiba says, sipping at his drink leisurely.

"Indeed!" Lee says brightly, giving him a 1000 watt smile. "Coach Guy told me to limit myself to only twenty laps today so I'll be in Top Condition!"

"_Only_ twenty he says." Shikamaru grumbles disbelievingly. "I'll never understand how you've stuck with football for so long. The training sounds like such a bother."

"Not at all Shikamaru! The—"

"The bond between teammates, the power of hard work, and all that. We got it the first five times Lee." Kiba cuts him off, sparing them all about five minutes of youthful ranting.

"Indeed! The Spirit of Sportsmanship is A Truly Beautiful Thing to behold!"

"Hey, has anyone seen Gaara today?" Naruto pipes up suddenly. "I wonder if he's skipping again…"

He shudders subtly, remembering the last time a teacher had gotten on the boy's case about his attendance.

"I'm wounded by your lack of confidence." Gaara says lowly from behind them, startling them. "I said I wouldn't."

"G-Gaara! It-It wasn't anything like that—!" Naruto said nervously. The disgruntled boy claimed to be their friend, but it never hurt to be safe. "I was just worried because you hadn't shown up yet!"

The boy _Hn_ed and sat down silently. A thick silence ensued.

"So…" Shikamaru starts, eyes quickly scanning the area for a change of topic to diffuse the situation, and notices a flyer taped to one of the cafeteria doors. "…it kind of seems like girls are being even more bothersome and gossipy than usual, anyone know what's up with that?"

Kiba and Naruto look to each other cluelessly and Lee gives an enthused. "I have no idea!"

"Homecoming Dance." Gaara says tersely.

They all turn to look at him inquisitively, though no one has the courage to ask why _he_ of all people knew, and Gaara merely stares back ominously.

"Ah… That would explain it." Shikamaru says finally. "Well, it's not as if any of us will have to worry about it."

He gets a few glares for the remark, but it's sadly true. Lee is too absorbed with his sports, most girls are terrified of Gaara, Chouji might as well not exist, the whole thing was far too bothersome for Shikamaru to so much as _think_ about, and Kiba and Naruto are gay. (Well, _bi_ technically, but they both like guys at the moment, so who's counting?)

Thankfully, the bell chose to ring at that moment, dismissing the depressing subject, and they all headed to their respective classes without bloodshed.

* * *

"Hey Shino, did you understand any of that?"

Shino does not curse on principle, because it's crude and problematic where other words will suffice without chance of reprimand, but had he been the type, he might have chosen this point in time to use some colorful vocabulary to express the magnitude of his discontent.

Since Sasuke had brought it up, he has begun recalling some vague incidents around the beginning of the school year in which Inuzuka had tried to talk to him. Of course all of these incidents had been dealt with shortly and impersonally, which apparently had put the other boy off enough that he had ultimately stopped trying.

The difference between now and then is that _now_, it's necessary that he be slightly more indulgent, what with how Sasuke had failed to convey his romantic intentions to Uzumaki and would be needing Shino to distract Inuzuka more. And seeing as it will be infinitely easier if they are on good terms, such a curt dismissal would be inconvenient.

So now, instead of a brief _Yes_ and a suggestion of reading the relevant chapter in the book, he has been dragged into trying to explain indefinite integrals in a way that Inuzuka might actually have a chance of understanding, with all the nonexistent social skills he never had, has, or ever will have.

"So you just add one to the exponent?" Inuzuka asks, chewing on his pencil frustratedly.

"No, you have to find the anti-derivative." Shino replies as encouragingly as his demeanor will allow.

"Of course… anti-derivative… right…"

Shino gives him a heavy look.

"What we've been using for the past two chapters."

"…oh… um… yeah, about that…"

Shino, in full indulgent mode, allows himself to sigh.

* * *

**AN:** Er...yeah, so another random AU that is slightly less involved than my Band AU. Yay vapid high school drama? Once again, no idea if this will ever be updated. (See profile page.) Hope you enjoyed it a little regardless. :D


	2. Chapter 2

A thick silence hangs in the air and Kiba swallows nervously, Shino's intense gaze doing nothing to quell his shivering nerves.

"Your answer…?" Shino says finally, in a low, almost ominous tone.

He takes a deep breath and exhales stiffly, bracing himself for the worst.

"⅓x³-6x+C"

"Correct."

"_Hell_ yeah! Suck it Naruto! I told you I could do it!" Kiba yells triumphantly, holding out a hand to his left, where Naruto was seated across from Sasuke.

Naruto scoffs and holds out a twenty dollar bill reluctantly, which is snapped up quickly by Kiba. "Yeah, but it took you all of lunch period."

Civilized conversation between them is abandoned at that point in lieu for grade school level bickering: shoving, name calling, and making faces included. Sasuke rolls his eyes and Shino takes this as a sign that he can continue reading in relative peace. Shikamaru groans, head slipping down onto the table and falling asleep, Chouji chuckles good-naturedly and watches, Lee looks to be cheering them on, and Gaara just looks ominous, as per usual.

Just about the time the two are winding up to deck each other in the face, Sasuke stands suddenly, slamming his hands down on the creaky wood picnic table.

"Look." He says venomously. "I get why _Inuzuka_—" adding no small amount of distain to the name, "is sitting here. Hell, I can even get_ dumbass_ being here." adding even more emphasis on his not-quite-affectionate nick name for Naruto, "But why the hell is the _peanut gallery_ sitting here too?" waving his arm in the general direction of the others.

"They're amusing." "Friends must stick together!" "…" "ZZZZZ"

"Who the hell are you calling dumbass, _bastard_?"

"If you're dumb enough to need to ask, you've earned it, _loser_."

Seeing as his bickering partner is now otherwise occupied, Kiba rolls his eyes at the familiarly squabbling pair and turns back to Shino excitedly.

"Hey man, thanks a ton, you're a real life saver!"

Shino hums uncommunicatively, not even looking up from his book.

"Not only did I get twenty bucks out of it, but I'll probably ace that quiz coming up too!"

Another short hum.

"Of course, for me even a B would be a miracle…"

Silence.

"Er… Any way I could repay you?" Kiba ventures, not entirely unsuggestively.

"No need."

"Oh… if you say so…" He trails off, scratching at his cheek awkwardly.

Silence.

Kiba gets the vague sense of trying to talk to a black hole and frowns tightly.

"Dude, I'm trying to talk to you, would you stop reading?" He says slightly irritated.

_Dude, I'm trying to read, would stop talking to me?_ is on the tip of Shino's tongue, but restrains himself, instead looking up blankly. Kiba's expression brightens for reasons he can't even begin to fathom.

"Can I help you?"

"Sure, talk to me." He says amusedly, as though it were all terribly obvious.

"About what?" Shino sighs in resignation.

Kiba looks bewildered, as though the thought had never occurred to him before in his life.

"Well…" He starts awkwardly, scratching his tattoo again. "…I dunno, what do you usually talk about?"

"I don't." He replies flatly.

Kiba pouts childishly. "Oh come on, surely you talk about something!"

"Not unless strictly necessary."

"Why?"

"I have nothing to say." Shino states simply, deriving some vague sense of amusement from Kiba's exasperation.

The bell rings conveniently and Naruto shoots off, challenging Kiba to a race to their next class over his shoulder, with the twenty dollars as the prize. Kiba yells indignantly and takes off after him with a competitive gleam in his eye, and the rest follow along leisurely.

As Shino gathers his books, he notices Sasuke pause to look back at him with a faintly analytical gaze.

"Yes?" He says blankly, worn out from dealing with Kiba.

Sasuke startles a bit and shakes his head.

"Nothing…Thanks."

Shino hums dismissively and walks off.

* * *

Math class goes more or less as usual, save Inuzuka insisting on reviewing with him before class starts, and then the enthused grin and thumbs up he gives him as Mr. Ibiki begins passing out the quizzes.

Shino finishes fairly early as always, noticing Inuzuka chewing on his pencil again as he returns to his seat after turning in his paper. He makes a mental note to inform him of how ridiculously unsanitary the habit is, as well as to never lend writing utensils to him.

As the end of class draws nearer, Shino watches as Inuzuka grows increasingly restless, biting at his lip and running his hand through his hair incessantly. The idea the boy has already forgotten how to do it is ridiculous. He was a bit slow on the uptake, certainly, but seemed to have no problem after he finally understood.

_However_ _ultimately,_ He reminds himself. _it's not my problem, seeing as our acquaintance is by convenience only._

Besides, why should he care when he has a perfectly good book he could be reading instead?

* * *

"Shino. A word."

The low baritone of Mr. Ibiki's voice surprises him, and the rest of the class for that matter, though in Shino's case not so much due to the man's generally terrifying aura, but in that he was addressing him in particular. The classroom emptied out notably more quickly than usual as he approached the teacher's desk, the last being Inuzuka, who hesitated at the door for a moment before leaving.

"Can I help you?" Shino says calmly. After all, there was no legitimate reason he would be in trouble, there was no need to worry.

"You seem to be fraternizing with Kiba a fair bit lately." Mr. Ibiki states uninvasively, shuffling through the quizzes and pausing at Inuzuka's, a heavy grimace set on his face.

Shino thinks for a moment, eyebrows furrowing slightly.

"I did not help him cheat."

Mr. Ibiki looks up at him sternly. "To the point as always…" He pauses to write something on the paper. "Are you sure that's not a guilty conscience talking?"

"I can merely think of no other reason you would need to speak with me. But so long as tutoring someone remains within the bounds of the honor code, I've done nothing wrong."

Mr. Ibiki lets out a sort of half-laugh-half-sigh, letting the tense expression drop. "Thankfully for the both of you. Isn't that right _Kiba_?"

A sort of choking sound comes from the direction of the door, and after a moment, Inuzuka walks in scratching his tattoo and laughing sheepishly. "Damn, so much for my career as a ninja…"

Mr. Ibiki shakes his head. "Well, if you can keep this up, you might want to look into mathematics." He says good-humoredly, holding out Inuzuka's paper.

He blinks for a moment, uncomprehending, before taking the paper. His jaw drops.

"You're joking."

"I'm afraid not."

"You're serious."

"Deathly."

"OH _HELL_ YEAH!" Inuzuka yells suddenly, throwing his arms around Shino carelessly. "Shino! You're my fucking hero!"

Shino pushes him away firmly, somewhat off put by the sudden invasion of his personal space. "Inuzuka." He says flatly, gesturing towards the teacher, who is very adamantly pretending that he was too caught up in grading papers to notice the profanity.

"My bad, my bad," The other boy laughs sheepishly again, not a hint of remorse on his face, brandishing the quiz for Shino to see. "I was totally freaking out because it all seemed too easy. I swore I bombed it! Seriously, I can't even remember the last time I got a 100 on anything math related."

Indeed, the paper was spotless save for a bright red 100 circled at the top. "Congratulations, I suppose?"

Inuzuka pouts at his reaction. "Oh right, you're one of those smart types that probably gets 100s _all_ the time."

Shino rolls his eyes and collects his things, heading for the door. "Probably."

Behind him he hears Inuzuka laugh shortly and assumedly follow him, because almost immediately after Mr. Ibiki yells after him.

"Don't bother the poor kid too much now!"

To which, much to Shino's chagrin, Inuzuka's only response is:

"Now Mr. Ibiki, you know I'd never make a promise I won't keep!"

* * *

**AN: **What do you know, I actually updated something in an almost acceptable timeframe. :D

Too bad it's so short. And please don't ask me why Ibiki is the Calculus teacher. I wouldn't be able to tell you.

You guys actually surprised me with how much you liked this. I had mostly only written it for the hell of it, but if people enjoy it then all the better. I'm thinking I might actually try and see this through, but as usual no guarantees~

Also I'll apologize ahead of time that this story is so all over the place. I tend to get ideas when I'm half-dead of sleep deprivation, which does not do wonders for comprehensibility and consistency. And no beta-ing as per usual.

Lastly, a huge thanks to all of those who left me reviews. You guys are too nice I swear.


	3. Chapter 3

The next day, the unthinkable happens.

Inuzuka realizes that they have study hall together.

"—Seriously Hinata you wouldn't _believe _the sort things they find in dog's stomachs! One time Hana—Whoa, whoa, whoa, Shino! You have Study hall too?"

It was yet another of those rare instances in which Shino regrets not being the type to curse.

"Unfortunately."

"I know right? It's so _boring_!" Inuzuka whines, dropping into the seat across the table from Shino. "Hey Hinata, don't just stand there looking gorgeous, take a seat and introduce yourself!"

The girl who Inuzuka had been speaking to before, presumably Hinata, turns a rather unhealthy looking shade of red at the comment, but sits hesitantly and stares down into her lap. "S-S-Sorry to int-trude…" She says near silently.

_Oh._ Shino thinks grimly. _One of __**those**__ types._

In the interest of not sending the girl into a baseless, guilt-induced emotional meltdown, Shino closes his book and tries to put up a pleasant front.

"Don't worry about it."

Silence pervades only as long as Inuzuka will allow it, sighing long-sufferingly.

"I should have expected this…" He leans over and grabs either side of Hinata's head, forcing her to look up at Shino. "Hinata, this is Shino. Shino, say hi."

"…Hi."

"Shino, this is Hinata. Hinata, say hi."

"H-Hello…?"

"Although, for recognition's sake, maybe I should introduce her like this." He laughs, turning her head back down, looking in her lap.

"K-_Kiba!_" Hinata stutters indignantly, struggling and managing to catch his chin solidly with her elbow, sending him off balance and tumbling backwards out of his chair. Laughter and scattered applause fill the room, accompanied shortly thereafter with the customary chorus of _Oooooh_s and some bizarre snapping gesture that Shino had never bothered to learn the mechanics of.

Inuzuka, meanwhile, recovers quickly with a sort of animalistic grace, and even takes a few exaggerated bows, meeting both praise and ridicule with an idiot's smile and staged humility.

The rest of the class returns to their business with remarkable speed as Kiba takes his seat again, still smiling, and Hinata bombards him with _Are you okay?_s and _I'm so sorry!_s.

"Easy there Hinata, I'm harder to kill than that! Besides I was practically asking for it." Inuzuka leans towards Shino in an exaggerated aside. "I think it goes without saying now, but despite her docile looks, she's got some kind of trippy, ancient Chinese kung-fu magic going for her so don't get on her bad side!"

Hinata gives him a very practiced, fondly exasperated look.

"Perhaps it would behoove you to take your own advice." Shino deadpans and Inuzuka just laughs.

"Nah man, Hinata and I are cool, right Hinata?"

She smiles indulgently and nods with a slight hum in acknowledgement.

"Hinata! Here you were. I was starting to get worried!"

Behind Hinata, two girls have appeared. Shino vaguely recalls that one of them is Sakura and the other is Ino, but can't for the life of him remember which is which.

The pink haired one, who had spoken before, seems to notice the other two for the first time, acknowledging them with a thinly pleasant smile that doesn't quite mask her discomfort.

The blond one is not so tactful.

"Geez Hinata! Why are you hanging out with _these_ two? Come on, I brought that dress catalogue you asked for! Can you believe that Sakura thinks she'd look good in _blue_?" Ino (presumably) drags her off without any real chance to get in a word edgewise, Sakura following, and Hinata sends the boys an apologetic smile before trying to stem the imminent catfight between her friends.

"I'll never understand why she's friends with them." Inuzuka says after a moment of awed silence, turning to see Shino absorbed in his book again. He clicks his tongue irritably.

"Oh, so I'm getting the book treatment again, huh?"

Shino gives no response and he pouts slightly, propping his head up on his arm in the very image of boredom.

"What are you reading that's so interesting anyways?"

Shino holds up the intimidatingly thick book to reveal its title: _The Encyclopedia of Flying Insects._

"Oh, it's bugs again— Hey wait! You were actually listening?"

Shino doesn't look up from the book. "_Probably_."

He hears Inuzuka snort after a moment. "You're an unexpectedly cheeky bastard, you know that?"

This time Shino looks up. "You have no obligation to socialize with me."

"No, no, cheeky is good. It means you're actually human."

Shino raises an eyebrow at that. "Sorry to have left you in suspense."

"I'm sure you are, but being the infinitely gracious sort of person I am, I'll try to put it behind me."

"I am forever indebted." He says sarcastically, and Inuzuka smiles.

"So you're real into bugs huh? You gonna be a bug scientist or something?"

"Entomologist."

"Gesundheit?"

Shino puts his book down again. "The term you're looking for is _entomologist_, someone who studies insects."

"Oh." Inuzuka pauses for a moment. "I like dogs, is there a fancy word for someone who studies dogs, too?"

Shino pauses, hand hovering near his mouth as he considers it. "I'm not familiar with a specific term, but there is most likely some variation, probably derived from a similar root as _canine_."

The look that Inuzuka is giving him is entirely too amused for Shino's tastes, smiling impishly into his palm in a poor attempt to be subtle. "What?"

"Oh nothing…" The other boy says mock innocently and quickly changes the subject. "So you know how you were _forever indebted_ to me for my forgiveness? I know how we can make it even."

"Oh?"

"Call me Kiba, _Inuzuka_ is so impersonal."

_There might be a reason for that._ Shino thinks bitterly. "I'll call you _God_ if you'll shut up and let me read."

_Oh wait… _He remembers belatedly. _That's right, I'm supposed to be being sociable so it will be easier to distract him for Sasuke…_

To his surprise Inuzuka seems unfazed.

"Hah! Also tempting, but no, we wouldn't want my true identity getting out like that."

Shino continues gingerly. "Fine, may I continue reading in peace, _Kiba_?"

_Kiba_ seems to consider it in an over exaggerated fashion. "_Well_… Alright I'll let you off the hook just this once, 'kay?"

Shino blinks. _Wait, what?_

"Hmm… Oh! I know, I'll go bother Tenten and Neji. They look bored." Kiba says aloud, wandering off just as abruptly as he had arrived.

Shino stares after him for a moment almost a little surprised that he actually _left_.

_Good riddance_. He tells himself firmly, and actually starts reading this time.

* * *

"—I backed down a little for even _one second_, and he's all over it like he's _proved_ something and—"

Shino turns the page, finishing up a chapter about bot flies and finally turns more than half his attention to Sasuke's griping.

"In other words," Shino interjects, summarizing in one sentence what the other boy has been complaining about for the past half hour. "you've tried all manner of subtlety, showmanship, praise, and dismissal to get your intentions across to him, all to no avail."

Sasuke gives him a somewhat deadpan look. "Have I ever mentioned how freaky being able to read and listen to someone at the same time is?"

"Numerous times. Don't avoid the question."

Sasuke looks away vaguely irritably. "Yeah."

"Have you tried just being straight about it?"

He glares. "Say 'no pun intended' or I might have to punch you."

"What do _you_ think?" Shino says shortly. "And don't avoid the question."

"…No." He mutters finally.

"So what's stopping you? _Pride_?"

Sasuke glares again, but looks away and doesn't say anything.

"Maybe that's your problem?"

His head snaps around again as if to say something, but stops short. Shino follows his gaze up to the front of the room, where Ms. Yuuhi is standing, arms crossing and foot tapping impatiently.

She gives them a faintly resigned pout. "Look you two, I know better than to think that you would wouldn't be able to ask any question I could ask right now, but if you simply _must_ gossip, at least go do it outside." She uncrosses her arms and gestures towards the door, tilting her hips in a way that makes many boys in the class swoon.

Sasuke gives her a vaguely venomous look, grabbing his books and exiting quickly with an air of badass-ery that makes many girls in the class swoon.

Shino gathers his things quietly and far less moodily, giving Ms. Yuuhi a brief _Excuse us._ as he leaves, and not so surprisingly, no one swoons.

He joins Sasuke outside and they silently agree to wander the halls.

"You two again?" Officer Hagane says incredulously from behind them. "How badly must you two suck at biology that you get thrown out almost every other _day_?"

"On the contrary—" Shino starts.

"Yeah, yeah, you two have the highest grades in the class. I heard in from Kurenai herself and I _still _can believe it. I mean damn, stay for the _view_ if nothing else. That lady's got one _hell _of a fine a—"

"_Kotetsu_, what has the principal said about chattering with students?" Officer Kamizuki says unmistakably crossly, rounding the corner just ahead of them. "I swear to god if I get chewed out _one_ more time because you were fuc—…_goofing_ _off_…"

"Alright, alright, I hear ya. Seriously though guys, make me an' Izumo's job easier an' be good, okay?" He says nonchalantly, the two school police officers turning down another hall saying something about the physics teacher and jealous boyfriends.

Sasuke, notably unimpressed by the near habitual exchange, begins walking again, brooding in his usual manner.

"Thinking about it?" Shino ventures, following unobtrusively.

"Yeah," The other boy says bitterly. "Thinking I must be some kind of idiot trying to get relationship advice from the school recluse."

"Wonderful, now you have something in common with Uzumaki." Shino says dryly, but sighs after a sharp glare and moment of contemplation. "Perhaps try approaching him somewhere where he'll be less likely to respond belligerently on principle alone. He most likely has his pride as well."

Sasuke considers it for a moment, but frowns. "And what kind of place would that be, _Dr. Love_?"

"Not my problem. _You're_ the lovesick schoolboy."

They've both stopped at this point, glaring each other down.

"Whatever." Sasuke sneers finally, which is about the closest thing to a thank you that Shino is going to get.

* * *

—_female dragonfly lay eggs in or near water, often on floating or emergent plants. When laying eggs, some species will submerge themselves completely in order to lay their eggs on a more advantageous surface. The eggs then hatch into nymphs—_

"—these assholes who where laughing the whole time because of Fuzzy Brows' _Power of Youth_ spiel, and _god_, you should have _seen_ their faces after he plowed them over for the winning touchdown. It was fucking _priceless_."

—_The majority of the dragonfly's life is spent in this naiad form, beneath the water's surface, using extendable jaws to catch other invertebrates or even vertebrates such as tadpoles, fish, etc. Some nymphs even hunt on land, an aptitude which could easily have been more common in ancient times when terrestrial predators were clumsier—_

"Nonsense, Naruto! In a Battle of True Sportsmen, there is no winning or losing, merely the Spirit of Teamwork, the Joy of Competition, and—!"

—_The larval stage of large dragonflies may last as long as five years. In smaller species, this stage may last between two months and three years—_

"The Sweet, Sweet Sting of Vengance!"

"No Kiba it's The—!"

—_When the larva is ready to metamorphose into an adult, it climbs up a reed or other emergent plant. Exposure to air causes the larvae to begin breathing. The skin splits at a weak spot behind the head and—_

"Can I please interrupt this _completely_ inane conversation and ask why the _fuck_ you guys are sitting at our table _again_?"

"What do you mean _your_ table? I don't see _Arrogant Prick_ written on it anywhere!"

"What did you say you—?"

—_the adult dragonfly crawls out of its old larval skin, pumps up its wings, and flies off to feed on midges and flies. The adult stage of larger species of dragonfly can last as long as five or six months—_

"Please Good Friends! Now is not The Time for Quarrel it—"

—_Damselflies (suborder Zygoptera) are often confused with newly moulted dragonflies but once a dragonfly molts it is fully grown. There are other distinct things that set them apart such as— _

"Ugh you guys are so troubleso—"

—_most damselflies hold their wings at rest together above the torso or held slightly open above (such as in the family Lestidae), whereas most dragonflies at rest hold their wings horizontally or occasionally slightly down and forward— _

"BASTARD!"

"_DUMBASS!_"

—_Also, the back wing of the dragonfly broadens near the base, caudal to the connecting point at the body, while the back wing of the damselfly is similar to the front wing— _

"Look, I hate to interrupt your foreplay, but—"

"_**DAMN IT, IT'S NOT FOREPLAY!**_" "_**I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU INUZUKA!**_"

—_The eyes on a damselfly are apart; in most dragonflies the eyes touch— _

"Dude, holy shit, _calm down _Uchiha! HEEL! _HEEL!_"

—_Notable exceptions are the— _

"GET BACK HERE YOU DUMB MUTT!"

—_Petaluridae (Petaltails) and—_

"EEK! SHINO SAVE ME!"

And thus Shino finds himself suddenly burdened with a clingy lapful of panicked Inuzuka, all but smothering himself in his neck and using him as a human shield.

Nothing.

No indignant reaction. No shocked recoil. No sarcastic retort.

Just staring for about five seconds until he decides that Kiba looks amusing when he's blushes.

Shino finally looks away from Kiba and takes in the situation.

It looks like the boy's friends were in the middle of holding Sasuke back when their attention was directed towards himself, and are now gaping in an awed, somewhat fearful manner. Sasuke's expression is notably similar, although more dumb-struck and decidedly less fearful.

Right. Some form of reaction is most likely in order.

Kiba is still, by some bizarre coincidence of how Shino had been holding his book and Kiba's reckless dive into his lap, being held like a princess in his arms and blushing enough to complete the look.

After a brief moment of contemplation, Shino decides that a thin, vaguely irritated response would be fitting.

"Are you _quite_ comfortable, _Kiba_?"

While this does manage to snap the boy out of whatever trance he had been in, it does not quite yield the desired response. Point of fact it yields rather the _opposite_ response, seeing as Kiba only clings _tighter_ to him and manages to knock the book that had been dangling in his hand to the ground.

"_Quite_. Man, I don't know if it's the massive jacket or what, but you're _really_ warm."

Shino blinks.

And blinks.

And then blinks one more time for good measure before raising his arm to tip the boy backwards out of his lap, which (because he is sitting on the edge of the bench) sends him tumbling to the ground with a resounding thud.

"MOTHER_FUCKER_! What the hell was that for you asshole?"

Shino calmly bends over to retrieve his book, brushing some dirt from its cover. "…You made me lose my page."

Kiba actually _laughs_ for reasons Shino may never understand, rolling his shoulders as he stands and looking towards the others.

"You're looking pretty comfy there yourself Naruto." He says jeeringly, referring to the way Naruto is still clinging to Sasuke's stomach to try and hold him back, while the rest had wandered back to their seats once Kiba's wellbeing was no longer in immediate danger.

The two tear away from each other at breakneck speed, doing their best not to look half as embarrassed as they are as the others laugh at their expense.

* * *

_He's fidgeting._

Kiba is fidgeting in his seat, rubbing at his back, and not paying attention to the lesson at _all_ and Shino has to keep reminding himself that he shouldn't _care_.

_Or maybe I should, since he'll inevitably come to me for help when he doesn't get it._

Yeah, that sounds convincing enough.

_Great. Now ignore the undisciplined idiot and focus on the lesson so you'll even understand it yourself._

_..._

_..._

_..._

_He's fidgeting again..._

_

* * *

_

"Kiba."

There are many possible follow ups to that statement that Kiba can honestly say he would have seen coming. ( "You have something in your hair.", "Stop bothering me.", "I hate your guts.", "If you die, I'll laugh at your funeral." )

But what he absolutely does _not_ see coming is Shino's terse _Hold still_, as he pulls up the back of Kiba's shirt and run his hand over the abraded skin from his earlier tumble at lunch.

_Fortunately_, he manages to strangle down the moan, but _unfortunately_ he is not so successful with the raging blush, and very deliberately does not look back.

"Sh-Shino! Wh-What the hell are you—?"

"It looks fine."

"What?"

"This." Shino lightly drags his finger down a long but shallow scratch running along Kiba's spine, completely ignorant to the shudder it causes. "It's not bad, but you need to stop scratching at it... Kiba are you listening?" Shino asks noting his unresponsiveness, finally taking his hand off Kiba's back and instead turning the other boy to face him. "You're face is somewhat red. Do you feel feverish? It could be a sign of infection. Make sure to have someone help you wash it out and apply some disinfecting ointment when you get home…What?" He questions, finally becoming aware of the Kiba's vacant staring.

"Oh! I er…" Kiba fumbles, scratching at his tattoo self-conciously. "I just… I've never heard you talk this much before..."

"Well in a manner of speaking, it is partially fault…" Shino mumbles, looking away and adjusting his sunglasses in a way that _maybekindofalmost_ might be apologetic, and Kiba can't help the smile that breaks out on his face.

"Apology accepted." He jokes, taking off with a wave and a _See ya later Shino!_ before the other boy can object.

* * *

"Oh Kiba, welcome home! How was your day pup?"

"_Terrible_, it's like I've become the butt of some cosmic joke and _everyone's_ in on it. I got elbowed in the face in Study Hall, I flunked a lit. quiz, got chased around by a homicidal _maniac _during lunch, scraped up my back, absorbed absolutely _nothing_ from Calculus..."

"That's a pretty shitty day kid, I'm not gonna lie, but if it was so awful then why are you grinning like an idiot?"

"No reason~"

"Oh really now?"

"Yep, I'll be in my room if you need me!"

"…"

"Hey Ma, where—"

"Hana."

"What?"

"Tread lightly tonight, I think your brother's finally lost it."

"_Again_?"

* * *

**AN: **Hello again everyone~ Sorry I took so long! (I actually have no idea how long it's been, but I can probably safely assume it was too long. D: ) At least it was a sort of longer chapter this time. I hope it wasn't disappointing...

Just to give credit where credit is due, the little excerpts from Shino's "book" are taken almost word for word from Wikipedia. Yes, I'm serious, yes, I'm lazy, and, no, I have no shame. Also how did you guys like Kotetsu and Izumo's cameo? For some reason the idea of them as school cops amuses me. And the physics teacher they were refering to is Asuma. I actually have a chart of who is who/what within the school. I was seriously that bored when first wrote this. (God why are AUs so fun?)

Anyways, you can go look up bot flies if you want, but trust me, you don't. They are some of the nastiest little sons-of-bitches nature has to offer. (Actually that's a total lie, nature totally has worse but just trust me on this one.) You can probably expect at least one or two more spotlights on other various bugs, some of which may or may not be ironic/amusing in context.

And for the record I have no idea if pink hair and green eyes would clash with a blue dress. I am color blind not by physical defect, but because I have got to be the most un-feminine female to ever walk the earth. For real.

Cutting off this long ass/rambling author's note, thanks again to anyone who reviewed or favorite-ed this story! :D I'm really starting to see why some people practically hold their stories ransom for these things, because they really do wonders for motivation. You guys are seriously awesome. :D I'll also go ahead and apologize for how incoherent half of this must be, because it's entirely too late and I should have been sleeping hours ago.

(PS: Does anyone one know of any particularly good SasuNaru/NaruSasu/whatever-the-hell-you-want-to-call-it fics? I'm hoping to include a little more of how their relationship develops too, but I seriously don't know how to handle them. I kind of suck with major characters. Not that I don't suck with minor characters too, just I just suck marginally less. )


	4. Chapter 4

Silence.

Shino thinks that perhaps, just as one cannot truly enjoy happiness without having experienced misery to contrast it, he had never really appreciated the complete and utter lack of noise before he met Kiba.

It's almost amusing, in a way.

But that's not really the point at the moment, and he can't help but wonder why he would be thinking of something like that at a time like this, when by all means he should be fully absorbed in the latest issue of the medical entomology journal that had come in the mail. After all, it was his dad's turn to make dinner tonight and he had long since finished his homework, thus leaving the entirety of the weekend to catch up on his reading in peace.

Resettling himself in his chair, his eyes find the sentence he had left off on before his mind had wandered and loses himself again.

* * *

"Okay seriously dude, I've been wondering for forever now. What the hell is up with you and Shino anyways?" Naruto says almost warily, eyes never once leaving the screen, reaching around absurdly with his controller as he mashes buttons, like it would somehow make his character hit harder or something. "He's such a _nerd_."

"You got a problem with nerds?" Kiba chimes back somewhat defensively, eyes similarly glued to the screen as Naruto's character KOs him. "You're the last person I'd pin to be judgmental."

"No no no! The guy's fine with me, creepy as _hell_, but that's not the point. I just don't get the attraction."

Kiba shrugs as he hands off the controller to Gaara, who is seated behind him on the couch. "Call me a sucker for the enigmatic types, I dunno."

"You know he's probably all pasty and gross under that coat right?" Naruto grumbles as the new round begins and Gaara easily counters his attacks.

"Well sorry not everyone in the world can be made of plastic like Mr. Ice Princess."

"Damn it Kiba I told you not to call Sasuke that! Only _I_ get to call him that!"

Kiba rolls his eyes as Gaara takes advantage of Naruto's distraction to deftly wipe the floor with him.

After Naruto passes the controller off to Lee (whining to Gaara about being too cruel) Shikamaru and Chouji return with a formidable stack of pizza boxes, essentially derailing the conversation. It was only later, while Lee and Gaara were on what had to be their hundredth tiebreaker round that Naruto abruptly brought it up again.

"Hey Kiba, you do know that aside from being about as emotionally dense as a brick wall, Shino's completely uninterested right?"

Kiba gives him a look, "Well duh, but where's the fun in going after someone who's already interested? Besides the weird ones are always amusing, and Shino's about as weird as they come."

"You're no shining example of normalcy yourself," Shikamaru cuts in dryly.

Kiba turns to glare at Shikamaru and Naruto speaks up hastily;

"Look all I'm saying is that you shouldn't mess with the guy too much if you're not serious. I mean, for all you know he could turn into one of the of those crazy stalker types that will sneak into your bedroom and kill you in your sleep or something."

Kiba rolls his eyes, "Oh come on, what's the worst that can happen?"

"I'm pretty sure he's saying that's the worst that can happen," Chouji supplies through a mouthful of pizza.

"What are you guys worrying for? It's not like I'm some naïve, blushing virgin bewitched by a dastardly stranger out to sully my honor," Kiba gestures dramatically.

"It's more the other way around than anything," Shikamaru drawls.

"Exactly. Besides it's not like I've got my hopes up or anything, he's just an interesting guy to talk to when you can force him to put the book down for more than two seconds."

"If you say so…" Naruto says, still slightly wary.

"Actually, speaking of lost causes," Kiba leans over and pokes him in the side. "When are you and Uchiha finally going to stop dancing around each other and just fuck already?"

"What can I say? The Uchiha courtship process is a complex and subtle art!" Naruto shrugs, stroking his chin pseudo-contemplatively.

"Yeah, too bad you're about as subtle as a kick in the nuts," Kiba jeers back.

"Hey—!"

"ALAS! ONCE AGAIN OUT GLORIOUSLY YOUTHFUL BATTLE ENDS IN A STALEMATE! YOSH! THE LOSER OF THIS ROUND WILL RUN _200 _LAPS AROUND THE SCHOOL TOMORROW!"

"You know, we really ought to help poor Gaara out. He and Lee have been going at it for like the last half hour," Chouji says somewhat guilty as Shikamaru cringes at the sheer mention of the expenditure of that much effort.

"You first."

* * *

"Morning Shino! What's the encyclopedia of the week this time?" Shino says nothing, but leans away from the boy looking over his shoulder instinctively, and Kiba pouts.

"What's with that reaction? I don't bite…hard. I mean unless you're into that kind of thing, hell I'm not one judge—"

Shino meets his cheeky grin with an unimpressed deadpan.

"Aw come on man, you know I'm just messing with you!" Kiba teases, looking back to the page Shino was reading. "Let's see… Feasibility of Controlling Ix…Ixo—"

"_Ixodes scapularis_" Shino interjects.

"—Ticks (A…Acar—)"

"(Acari: Ixodae)"

"—the Vector of Lyme Disease, by Parasitoid Augmentation… A parasitoid… that's like fleas right?"

"Not precisely. While a typical parasite will bring some degree of harm to its host, parasitoids ultimately kill and consume them."

Kiba looks slightly uneasy at that, but after a second starts looking truly worried, "Wait, so _feasibility of controlling…_ parasitoids can use mind control?"

Shino quirks and eyebrow, biting back a smirk. "There are certain species of wasps that can do something to that effect, but only in insects such as caterpillars or cockroaches. Moreover, in this case they are referring to population control, specifically of blacklegged or deer ticks."

The other boy relaxes again, jovial tone returning abruptly, "Well shit dude, you had me worried for a second there! It sounds like some kind of terrible B-grade horror flick or something," He laughs, "still, fighting parasites with parasites is kind of poetic huh?"

"Perhaps," Shino mutters in defeat and, sensing that he wouldn't be getting any more reading done this study hall period, sets down his periodical. He had actually only chosen a period this early in the morning so all the slackers would be too busy doing their homework at the last minute to bother him. But, seeing as Kiba had sabotaged that nicely, he resigns himself to an unproductive hour and curses Sasuke silently in the back of his mind.

Kiba seems pleased by this and continues rambling, "So anyways, you know Mr. Hatake?" Kiba asks, nodding his head towards the rather apathetic looking teacher clicking away at the computer on his desk in the back of the room. "I heard from Naruto that he's usually looking at porn during class and that he'll say yes no matter what you ask him. Here, watch this."

"Hey Mr. Hatake! Can I skip class?"

"…Alright…" The teacher says distractedly, and a few students snicker as a hush sweeps around the room.

Ino stands up suddenly. "Oh! Mr. Hatake! Don't you think Sakura's forehead is like the size of a billboard or something?"

"…Yeah..." He mumbles and this time Sakura stands in indignation.

"Oh yeah? Well what about Ino? She's ill-mannered like BOAR, right?"

"…Of course, now settle down..." He says waving his hand distantly, still fixated on his computer even while the class laughs.

Soon everyone is pitching in.

"Principal Senju must have had plastic surgery right?"

"Mmhm."

Are Mr. Sarutobi and Ms. Yuuhi dating?

"…Pretty much..."

"You'd totally do Mr. Umino wouldn't you?"

"…Sure..."

"If you strung a line between two swallows could they carry a coconut?"

"Depends, are they African or European Swallows?"

The raucous laugher that had been filling the classroom halts abruptly.

Kiba stares dumbstruck, "You actually…How long were you listening?"

Mr. Hatake looks up from his computer, smiling unreadably, "Wouldn't you like to know?"

Kiba and a few others choose to laugh at this while others whisper amongst themselves, though Ino and Sakura in particular look to be giving Mr. Hatake simultaneous glares that would kill lesser men.

Finally, after the class seems to settle back into their procrastination and gossiping, Shino speaks up, "I'm assuming that was not your intention."

Kiba grins sheepishly, scratching the tattoo on his cheek, and Shino wonders idly if he's even conscious of the habit. "Man I wish I could plan something like that. Wait 'til Naruto hears about this!" The other boy looks ready to go off on another tangent, but seems to notice Shino's unspoken curiosity.

"What?"

"What _are_ these triangles exactly?" He says after a slight pause, touching Kiba's cheek lightly.

He's taken aback for a moment at the voluntary physical contact, but registers the question after a moment and frowns, "They're _fangs_ thank you very much."

"_Fangs_ then."

The other boy grins. "It's kind of a funny story actually… You know Gaara, right? The one who kind of looks like he hasn't slept in years and might rip your balls off if you look at him the wrong way?"

Shino raises an eyebrow skeptically, but nods.

"So yeah, Naruto had somehow managed to talk to him without provoking some kind of mass homicide and it turns out that it was his birthday soon, so the _idiot_ decides to throw him some kind of sleepover deal, not knowing that the reason Gaara usually looks like he hasn't slept in days is because he usually _hasn't_. He's got insomnia something terrible… Poor guy's been through a lot…"

Kiba scratches his cheek again, holding his usually loose tongue, but starts up again suddenly;

"In any case, the party thing was pretty much a total wash, but Temari and Kankuro, Gaara's sister and brother, were so happy he finally had some friends that some cheap beer was somehow added into the equation, and by the time we woke up the next morning—hung over as _all_ _fuck_ mind you—these had happened." He points to his _fangs_. "And it wasn't just me either. Naruto had those weird whisker-y thingies, Shikamaru and Chouji both had their ears pierced, and on top of that Chouji also had the swirls. Oh god, and Lee… I can't remember jack, but apparently Lee went apeshit and ran off for a while, so he was the only one who got out unscathed. But the _best_ part, you know that Chinese character Gaara has above his right eye? The one that most people think means something like blood, carnage, or 'I will murder you in your sleep'? It means _love_."

Shino makes a semi-noticeable expression of disbelief and Kiba laughs.

"I know right? Scary, quiet, _I eat small children for breakfast_ Gaara has _love_ tattooed to his head."

Shino scoffs to himself silently and the other boy becomes uncharacteristically serious.

"You just laughed." Kiba says quietly before a smirk surfaces.

Shino gives him a blank look.

"You totally just laughed, didn't you?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about," He replies evenly, turning back to his reading.

"Sure, sure, whatever you say man." Kiba says in his inexplicably cheerful way, as if he had just won a prize or something.

"However…" Shino says with sudden disapproval, "even putting aside the fact you were partaking in underage drinking," Kiba rolls his eyes, stretching his arms behind his head and balancing as he leans back in his chair, "I can't help but wonder what kind of shady tattoo parlor you were at if they allowed five clearly inebriated teenagers to get tattoos and piercings without parental consent. Just hope you were up to date on all your Hepatitis and tetanus shots."

The other boy sighs exasperatedly. "Good grief man, I bet you're a _hit_ a parties."

Shino doesn't dignify that with a response, and Kiba continues. "Probably Kankuro's fault though now that I think about it. He's nothing like the rumors say, but damn does the guy have a mean streak a mile wide. Payback for making fun of the puppets no doubt. The asshole," Kiba says fondly, or at least as fondly as one can speak of someone while calling them an asshole, "I still wonder why I dated that guy sometimes…"

_That_ makes Shino look up from his book, "You dated Gaara's _brother_?"

Kiba looses his balance and tumbles backwards yet again, although this time by his own fault.

The customary _Oooh_s and snapping follow, but Kiba merely rights himself on the floor rubbing the back of his head, half from soreness and half from awkwardness. He had never really been in the closet to begin with and never really made an effort to hide it, so the idea that his orientation surprises _anyone_ at this point is kind of weird. Though with Shino being the social retard that he is, maybe he shouldn't really be surprised.

"Wh-What? You have a problem with that?" He mumbles, unable to help a slight pang of nervousness.

"Not particularly. It would be rather strange if I did, all things considered."

Kiba scarcely contains a sigh of relief and takes the diversion gratefully as he picks up his chair and takes his seat again, "And by _all things considered_, you mean Sasuke and Naruto, right?" He says finally, giving Shino a wry grin, "wow, it must be even more painfully obvious than I thought if even _you_ noticed."

"…I'm going to chose not to take offense to that."

"Seriously though, despite the fact that all they do is bitch at each other, they're so completely and mind-boggling obsessive about it that it's kind of hard not to. Sometimes I wonder if they only fight so much because they don't know any other way to communicate with each other or something," Kiba laughs wryly.

"That very well may be the case."

He perks up. "Oh?"

"It's probably not my place to say," Shino says hesitantly, "but vapid popularity aside, Sasuke is about as socially stunted as I am, just in different ways."

"Hold up, if you _know_ you're that bad why don't you _do_ anything about it?"

Shino shrugs it off, "I see no reason to change."

"Oh come on! Don't you care that most people only know you as 'That Creepy Bug Guy'?"

"Not particularly," He replies flatly, "though I can't help but wonder why you're so bothered by it."

"Well, someone ought to be," Kiba shrugs stiffly, "anyways, if you're so privy to the inner workings of the Uchiha mind, when is Sasuke actually going to make a move? Don't tell me he's just going to try and ignore it?"

Shino hesitates again, "From what I can tell he is still trying to figure out his priorities."

"Priorities? What's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing you should concern yourself with too heavily."

Kiba looks indignant. "Look, if I had wanted to meddle I would have a long time ago. I'm just trying to figure out what could possibly be more important than being with someone you're that stupidly in love with."

"My point exactly."

The other boy seems bewildered by this but shrugs. "Well whatever. He'll get his shit together sooner or later. Anyways, so I was watching this dog show yesterday—"

* * *

Amazingly enough, as the week went on and Sasuke continued to be emotionally retarded, Shino found himself growing steadily more used to Kiba's not so subtle insertion into his day-to-day life.

He was personally inclined to liken it to repeated blunt head trauma, (whether from adrenaline, injury, or surpassing the human pain threshold, you kind of stop feeling it after a while) but he tended to be cynical like that.

Apparently Sasuke and himself had also met whatever loose terms of inclusion Kiba's group of friends had, and were now eating with them on a regular basis.

He hated to admit, but he had also found out quite a few things (some bits more interesting then others) about his new lunchmates, but surprisingly not from the actual lunch period, which was more predominated by Sasuke and Naruto being their particular brand of coy with each other.

No, most of his newly acquired information came from his study hall period, which he had mentally renamed _Listen-to-Kiba-Ramble-on-About-Nothing-in-Particular-While-Making-Choice-Commentary_ Period, because apparently Kiba took one-sided conversations as a sign he needed to talk _more_. (Ironically, he took any participation on Shino's part as a sign he needed to talk more too.)

In any case, through many a tale of ill-thought out teenage escapades, Shino had become privy to quite a bit of context to Kiba's life.

For instance, he and Hinata had been childhood friends, and his rather thinly veiled, baseless resentment of her cousin Neji was actually not so baseless, and had a lot to do with the fact that there had been a lot of familial tension and bullying going on. Kiba had been surprisingly reticent on the specifics of that, but at the very least made it clear that at some point there had been a reversal of attitude and that Neji was actually far more likely to look out for Hinata than hurt her now. He had also accidentally let it slip one time while teasing Hinata that she was crushing something terrible on Naruto, and made him promise on pain of death that he wouldn't tell. (Really, who _did_ everyone seem so sure he was gossiping with anyways?)

He also found out that Shikamaru and Chouji had grown up together because their fathers had been close friends, and that they had met Kiba in middle school along with Naruto. Lee followed a year or so later (having become familiar with them gradually when he'd see them while running laps around the school), and Gaara had only joined them in high school, though the exact reasons even Kiba didn't know, aside from Naruto having the insuppressible compulsion to be friends with _everyone_ (or maybe just the traumatized ones).

Of course there was also quite a bit of pointless blather as well.

Kiba's favorite color was in fact red, he had a mutt named Akamaru that was apparently quite large, Chouji preferred barbeque flavored chips above all other snacks, Shikamaru enjoyed playing shougi, Naruto had gone through a brief catchphrase period in which he had said _Believe it!_ after every other sentence (which they had threatened him with bodily harm for after the second day), and Gaara had an odd preoccupation with raccoons that no one had ever had the heart to ask about.

It was, on the whole, mildly bothersome, but at the very least routine. And if there was anything that Shino was good with (besides insects and not talking) it was routines.

This, however, was not part of the routine.

Save for when he wanted to ask for more help with homework or was feeling particularly giddy about a good grade, Kiba was usually the first out the door when the bell rang, off to whatever exercise in bad judgment their posse had in mind.

But today, he had not dashed out the door as soon as physically possible. Specifically, he had seated himself rather deliberately in front of Shino, peering over the top of his periodical in what Shino took to be yet another one of his poor attempts at subtlety.

"Yes?" Shino says finally, looking up from his reading.

"Oh! You finally noticed," Kiba grins teasingly, plucking the article out of his hand and thumbing through it.

Shino's eye twitches involuntarily. "Can I help you?"

"Hm? Not really, I was just wondering if you even heard the bell ring," Kiba says distractedly. "Wow, there's a lot of veterinary stuff in here…"

"Indeed. It is a _medical_ entomology periodical,," Shino says indulgently, taking back the text in question and gathering his books.

"Huh, I didn't know it got that specific…" Kiba trails off. "So, any big plans for the weekend?"

"Plans?"

"Yeah, it's _Friday_." He insists, as though that would impart some sort of understanding.

"…"

"Nevermind. Stupid question," Kiba shrugs, slinging his bag over his shoulder before heading off with a _See ya tomorrow Shino! _yelled carelessly behind him.

* * *

**AN: **I'm tempted to start apologizing like a flailing idiot here for not updating in a horrifically long time, but that holds even the slightest indication that it won't happen again, and in all honestly it more likely than not will. D: I hope it will at least suffice to say that I feel like a horrible person that should probably just disappear from the face of the internet forever, but I get the sense that I might get some mightily pissed off emails if I did.

Oh, and an actually kind of important note, "Feasability of Controlling _Ixodes scapularis_ Ticks (Acari: Ixodidae), the Vector of Lyme Disease, by Parasitoid Augmentation" is an actual article by E.F. Kipling and C.D. Steelman and in no way belongs to me. It's available via the Entomological Society of America website. (I can totally send you a link if you're interested. :D ) Basically, I'm the sort of dork that does way too much research when I write fanfiction. WAY TOO MUCH.

Also feel free to spontaneously burst into praises, as Jamaica-tan (the poor masochistic soul) has taken one for the team and is now beta-ing for me. So many thanks and condolences for that. :D Don't worry though, I'll still find a way to make it suck. Haha.

And please note that I in no way support underage drinking, but it's one of those things that just seems happen with kids these days. Well that and the character for 'love' is totally the sort of thing you would find tattooed to your head the morning after getting shitfaced.

It occurred to me after re-reading my past chapters (to look for mistakes), that my particular style of third person narration can be a bit schizophrenic at times, mostly because I tend to let the character I'm focusing on flavor the tone so to speak. Or maybe I'm just a bad writer, who knows. Hahaha. I've also noticed that I have a terrible habit of not really describing settings, so I'll try to work on that too. (Needless to say if any of you guys notice any other bad habits of mine, please, for the love of all that is holy, let me know.)

In any case, I think I might finally have a vague sort of handle on Naruto and Sasuke, or at least I'd better with all the drabble-y things I've written. Hell I could probably publish a whole other fic with all of it. :/ This by no means, however, guarantees that it won't end up terrible anyways. Just saying. And a huge thank you to anyone who left me a recommendation. Aside from being helpful, I actually enjoyed pretty much all of them. :D

So anyways, once again, a million thanks to everyone reading and a million and one thanks to those who left a review or favorite-ed. On principle I try to respond to each review personally, but my deepest apologies to anyone who may have slipped through the cracks. (Which due to my crazy schedule, there were probably at least one or two. D:)

I'll really try to do something about that whole _Updating-More-Than-Once-A-Year_ thing, but as usual I make no guarantees. I do however give Jamaica-tan (or any of you for that matter) permission to verbally kick my ass if I don't. :D


	5. Chapter 5

It's like a self-fulfilling prophecy or something.

_See ya tomorrow Shino!_ Kiba had said, and Shino had thought to himself:

_Seeing as tomorrow is Saturday, if I really do see him, then someone up there must really hate me._

Well clearly, _someone_ was feeling spiteful this morning.

"_How rare. I think this might be the first time you've ever called me, Sasuke."_

"_Shino…_y_ou're going to hate me for this but—"_

"_Then how about I save us both the trouble and hang up now?"_

"—_We're hanging out with Naruto and his friends at the town center."_

"…_**We**__?"_

"_Look, you said it yourself right? Maybe if it's not at school, then he won't be so…"_

"…_Argumentative?"_

"…_Yeah. So just be in front of the theater at three, alright?"_

* * *

"Hey Shino! Don't space out on me dude! The big bad is wide open!"

Right. _Chrono Panic II_. Boss Fight. No more quarters.

Somehow the group had come to the decision to raid the arcade next the theater after watching some utterly vapid school comedy, and Shino had been drafted into playing co-op mode with Kiba. Thankfully for them both, he had been a bit of an FPS junkie at one point and was more than familiar with the game.

The boss went down quickly after that, Kiba lasting about halfway through the next level while Shino managed to hold out until the next boss fight.

"How the hell did you get so much higher of a score than me? You weren't shooting even _half_ as much as I was!"

"Probably because when I shoot, I _aim_ instead of spraying bullets randomly."

"Hey! I was dropping those guys by the _dozens_. You have no reason to complain," Kiba stretches and shakes out his arms a bit, looking around, "Now where'd those nut jobs get off to?"

Last time he had checked Lee had been trying to coax Gaara onto one of those dancing games, while the rest had been trying out some new fighting game with ninjas or something. However, both machines were now occupied by other patrons.

"Ah, I found 'em!" Kiba says suddenly, grabbing the edge of his sleeve to drag him over towards a cluster of tables, "Hey guys! Got your asses kicked already?"

"Not us, but Naruto and Sasuke probably set a record for how fast they blew through all our money," Chouji says good humouredly through a mouthful of chips.

"Hey! It's not my fault this bastard decided to _cheat_."

"I never cheated, _sore_ _loser_."

"Like hell you didn't! You kept using that damn Chidori thing like every three seconds!"

"And yet you kept walking right into it. _Besides_ it's not like you were any better with the shadow clones! You're supposed to use one or two, not _twenty_ dumbass."

"Yeah, yeah, feel free to move the pissing contest to bathroom guys," Shikamaru chimes in dismissively, fingers stuck in his ears to try and drown out the two's bickering. Kiba just laughs before moving along unperturbed.

"Oh yeah! Lee, Gaara how'd the dancing thing go?"

"I did not participate," Gaara says lowly, arms crossed and glaring at the machine in question across the ways, making the people actually using it visibly uncomfortable.

"I was unfortunately unable to convince Gaara of The Healthful Benefits and Ceaseless Gratification of Rhythm Gaming!" Lee says tearfully. "But fear not! One day I will surely convince him, and then we will compete in A True Battle of Comrades in Rhythmic Glory!" He shouts, half standing on his chair with his fist high in the air, summoning vague notions of crashing waves and sunsets for no clearly discernable reason.

To which Gaara's only response is _I'll pass_ and the others laugh.

"Speaking of _rhythmic glory_," Naruto says suggestively, "you and Shino were gone for quite a while there Kiba. Having fun with those _shooting games_?"

Kiba rolls his eyes and laughs. "You know it Naruto, Shino's got a hell of a fine aim, _if you know what I mean_."

Shino's not sure why the two are laughing.

"I've had a lot practice," Shino says plainly, "I played a lot of first person shooters back in middle school."

The table goes dead silent for a moment before everyone (save Sasuke and Gaara) bursts out laughing.

"It shouldn't be _that_ surprising. They're good for blowing off steam," Shino continues evenly, frowning behind his collar.

"Among other things," Naruto manages to add on and the laughter erupts anew.

Shino frowns further and looks to Sasuke for some semblance of reason, only to find the boy hunched over with his face buried in his hands and shoulders shaking suspiciously.

In a last ditch attempt he turns to Kiba, who looks on the edge of an aneurism trying to contain himself. "I don't understand why this is so surprising."

The other boy takes a deep breath and smiles toothily, patting him on the shoulder pseudo-sympathetically. "Considering your social skills, I don't think it's surprising _at_ _all_."

And this time, even Sasuke is laughing.

Categorizing this as another one of those bizarre teenager things he may never understand, Shino decides that he's somehow stumbled across a new and frightening breed of insanity that, considering Sasuke's current condition, is most likely contagious through association.

_Why do people keep telling me I need to get out more again?_

_

* * *

_

By the time everyone manages to settle into normal conversation again, Shino had long since given up, taking refuge in a book he had hidden somewhere in that infuriatingly large coat of his.

Kiba might have felt a little bad for him under normal circumstances, but hell if he hadn't walked _right_ into it, and if he was really dense enough to miss the near tangible levels of innuendo they had been throwing around then he deserved every word of it.

Regardless, it wasn't long at all before their stomachs were calling for dinner, and they decided to meet up at Chouji's for food (because Chouji's mom had perfected the art of making delicious food in mass quantities) and then hang out next door at Shikamaru's (since that's where his and Chouji's collective stash of games and movies were housed).

Naruto, ever the optimist, extended the invitation to Sasuke and Shino, but, to the surprise of no one, was firmly refused by both parties. Inevitably the group splits, Shino and Sasuke heading one way and the rest going the other, but Kiba hesitates staring at the retreating two's backs contemplatively.

"Hey Shika, I still have that _Kingdom Warrior_ game of yours right?"

Shikamaru looks back at him skeptically. "…Save the excuses for Shino and just go you freaking stalker."

Kiba opens his mouth, ready to retort, but remembers that this is Shikamaru and merely grins deviously instead. "I'll catch up with you guys later."

"Good luck ditching Sasuke," Chouji says teasingly.

"Thanks, I'll probably need it!" Kiba yells back, turning the corner to follow the other two.

"Say Shikamaru, do you think we should send Naru—"

"Hey Chouji! Your mom can make _ramen_ right? _Ramen_ sounds sooooo good right now. _Ramen_ would be awesome. I looooove _ramen_—"

"Don't even bother."

* * *

When Kiba catches up to them, he finds Shino and Sasuke walking at an easy, but none the less deliberate pace, and speaking in soft, almost secretive voices.

_Oh? What are they being all hush-hush about?_

He decides to hang back a bit, but tries to keep in ear shot so that he might catch something interesting. But without warning, a few things happen in rapid succession:

First, Sasuke crosses in front of Shino and presumably reaches for something on the ground, but because Shino is rather opaque in nature, Kiba can't precisely tell.

Second, Kiba, being the curious sort, leans out from the wall he had been hiding behind to try and get a better look.

Third, Shino steps suddenly to the side and looks back at him with a slightly curious raised eyebrow.

Fourth, Sasuke makes some sort of quick, violent motion that Kiba misses because he's too busy staring at Shino.

Finally, Kiba gets hit straight between the eyes with a small, but aggressively pointy rock and falls gracelessly on his ass, though to his credit, more from surprise than force of impact.

By the time Kiba finishes swearing a black streak, he looks up to see the other two looking down at him with varying levels of disgust, disapproval, and apathy.

"Oh, it's just you." Sasuke rolls his eyes dismissively, tossing a second rock up and down effortlessly.

"_Just me_ my ass! Watch where you're throwing shit Uchiha, you damn near took my eye out!" Kiba snarls angrily, doing his best to seem menacing while sitting on the ground and rubbing his forehead childishly.

Sasuke snatches the second rock out of the air decisively before dropping it and turning away in disinterest. "Trust me, if I wanted to take an eye out, you'd be half blind now."

Kiba looks about ready to shed blood, so Shino steps between them diplomatically, offering him a hand up.

"Did you need something?" he asks as Kiba hauls himself up, pulling his hand away as soon as physics and common courtesy will allow.

"Huh? …Oh! Yeah, I wanted to go get one of Shikamaru's games from my house," Kiba says dismissively, hesitating as long as possible before Shino starts walking again, seeming unfortunately adamant on keeping pace with Sasuke.

"Then why were you following us like that?"

"Ah well…" Kiba scratches the back of his neck evasively, "I didn't want you guys to think I was being creepy and stalking you or something like that," he lies smoothly, "plus, it kind of looked like you were discussing something private, so I didn't want to _intrude_ or anything."

Shino merely hums at this, though Kiba swears he hears Sasuke snort from a short ways ahead of them. After a few moments of silence in which Kiba looks around for something to throw at the back of the egotistical bastard's stupid duck butt-shaped head (as Naruto would have oh-so-delicately phrased it), Shino surprises him by actually saying something without being asked.

"Cynology."

"What?" Kiba looks up at him, squinting uncomprehendingly.

"The study of canines or domesticated dogs is informally known as cynology, derived from the Greek word _kynos_. As such, someone who studies dogs could be referred to as a Cynologist, however it is not recognized as a standard scientific discipline."

"You… actually looked that up?"

Shino shrugs. "I find the pursuit of knowledge to be a reasonable use of my time."

"Whatever you say dude," He laughs, "just be careful or else I might start thinking that you actually like me!"

Shino rolls his eyes. "Yes, we wouldn't want you finding out that I'm actually madly in love with you, but wear an indifferent façade to shield my fragile heart from your inevitable rejection," He drones mockingly, and Kiba almost trips.

"I-Is that how it is? Ahaha…ha…"

Shino raises an eyebrow. "I was being completely sarcastic mind you."

"O-of course!"

The other boy hums noncommittally once again, but stops suddenly. "I'll see you at school then."

Kiba can't help the brief half-second of panic, thinking Shino might be suspicious, but squashes it as soon as he looks around and realizes that this must be his neighborhood. "Cool, see ya around man!"

Shino waves half-heartedly over his shoulder and Kiba continues on his way, sighing scratching his cheek self-consciously, as soon as the other boy is out of earshot.

"Deceptively stupid isn't he?" Sasuke says suddenly, from where he definitely hadn't been a half a second ago.

Kiba jerks slightly, whipping his head around in a fluster before laughing self-derisively. "Yeah… unbelievably so."

"If it's any consolation, it took me two years to get to the point where he was comfortable enough to joke with me like that," Sasuke says flatly, "how you managed it in under a month I'll never understand."

Kiba's eyes widen. "You've got to be kidding. What the hell did you guys talk about for two years?"

"We didn't. This whole friendship thing actually caught us _both_ by surprise."

Kiba gives him a fairly skeptical look, and content to leave it at that, Sasuke turns to leave.

"Well, emotionally constipated or not, I'm kind of surprised you're so okay with your friend getting hit on by a guy… you know, considering how in denial you are about your crush on Naruto and all."

The brief look of panic is made slightly less satisfying by the surrounding aura of sheer murderous intent, but surprisingly, Sasuke makes no attempt to deny it and Kiba let's himself hope that maybe he might not be such a lost cause after all.

"Look. I'm not bringing this up to be an asshole—" Kiba starts, and Sasuke give him a look.

"Okay fine…. I'm not bringing his up _just_ to be an asshole—it's not like I have a problem with you two or anything… but are you even serious about him? I mean, the part where they'll never find your body if you screw him over kind of goes without saying, but I get a front row seat to your married couple bickering and I still have a hard time believing it sometimes."

Sasuke glares and looks poised to say something biting or supercilious, but merely rolls his eyes and walks off.

"Hey! Where do you think you're going? I'm not done with you Uchiha!" Kiba makes a grab at his shoulder, but he sidesteps it effortlessly.

"I'll put it this way Inuzuka. An Uchiha is always serious," Sasuke says, very adamantly not looking back "_always._"

It takes a moment, but as soon as Kiba gets it he laughs unabashedly. "Just man up say you like him you pussy!"

This time, he manages to dodge the rock.

* * *

_This can only go bad places._ Shino thinks to himself grimly while Kiba and Naruto lock eyes across the table for the twelfth time that lunch period.

_Now?_ Kiba seems to query silently and Naruto looks away nervously in response. _No, not yet._

Naturally, the chances of most parties present _not_ having noticed are steadily approaching zero, and Shikamaru in particular looks to have developed a slightly psychotic looking twitch.

Despite this the two have done a commendable job in keeping conversation going, Sasuke in particular just now seems to have noticed that Naruto has been more or less baiting him with subjects he knows will get him ranting.

Unlucky glance number thirteen comes, and true to superstition, Naruto nods and Kiba grins conspiratorially.

"Shino! Let's go for a walk!" he says abruptly, standing and pulling Shino up and away from the table, leaving no time to protest.

Looking back he sees Shikamaru sigh and rise from his seat in one fell, and surprisingly graceful, swoop, muttering something about suddenly being hungry (despite turning down food earlier). As Chouji moves to follow him, he reminds Lee and Gaara that apparently they had a tie to settle, and Lee has disappears with said boy in tow before Chouji even has the chance to fully stand.

By the time Kiba pulls him around the corner of the building, Naruto is left smiling cheekily at a hostilely apprehensive Sasuke.

* * *

"It's been a while hasn't it?" Naruto says smugly, though the way he's swinging his feet and rubbing the back of his neck comes off more childish than anything, "since we've talked just the two of us like this…"

Not half a second ago Sasuke's mind had been filled to the brim with scathing remarks, derisive statements, and at least ten ways to break bones in case of a frontal assault, all effortlessly forgotten the second Naruto had directed that damnably disarming smile his way.

That smile was going to be the death of him someday.

"That was a long time ago."

Naruto's mood dampens. "Well maybe if you weren't such a—" He cuts himself off, realizing fairly quickly what would happen if he finished that sentence. "Well, putting your bastard tendencies aside…" He stands suddenly, clearing his throat and settling Sasuke with a determined look.

* * *

"Are we quite far enough yet?"

"Hm?" Kiba looks back at him, seemingly oblivious to the fact that they were already on the complete opposite side of the school grounds and he was still happily dragging Shino along by the arm. "Yeah, probably."

"I see," Shino says plainly, removing himself none so gently from the boy's grip. Kiba looks somehow offended and, deciding it would be better for his health not to ask, Shino keeps walking. "so what's Naruto planning this time?"

The conspiratorial grin makes a comeback. "Well you see…"

* * *

"SASUKE UCHIHA! WILL YOU GO OUT WITH ME?" Naruto _yells_, for all the world to hear, and Sasuke, for once in his life, has the decency to look flustered.

"HUH? That—! I—! …I was going to ask you _first_!"

Naruto stares at him in disbelief and it sounds ridiculous even to Sasuke's ears.

"WHAT? Is that seriously how you're responding this? I'm standing here telling you that I love you and all that you have to say is that you wanted to do it _first_? _SERIOUSLY_?"

"SH-SHUT UP! What the hell is with this flashy confession anyways? You and Kiba had to make eyes at each other all lunch period just for _this_? If you wanted a private conversation there's this great thing they have now call a fucking _telephone_!"

"_BASTARD_!"

"_LOSER_!"

* * *

"A confession?"

"Yep!" Kiba confirms amusedly, "Naruto kept telling us that he'd get Sasuke to make the first move, but his patience finally ran out."

"And you think he'll actually follow through?"

"_Definitely_, that guy never backs down once he's made up his mind."

Shino pauses to consider this. "I see. That's quite convenient then."

Kiba laughs. "Yeah, maybe they'll finally stop bitching at each other now that their UST is resolved."

"Ah, no…" Shino hesitates, and, noticing that he's stopped walking, Kiba turns around to look at him. "I suppose I also have a confession to make…"

Kiba's eyes widen and some red creeps into his complexion, but before he can open his mouth, Shino looks away awkwardly and continues.

"This may be somewhat surprising given the brief duration of our acquaintance, but the truth is I…" Shino hesitates again, Kiba feels like his heart might stop.

* * *

Naruto slams his hands down and the table protests creakily. "GOD _DAMN_ IT! Why are we even _arguing_ about this? Will you just give me an answer already?"

"That—! Well…"Sasuke clears his throat decisively. "No! No, I won't go out with you!"

This time Naruto is the one stumbling over his words. "WHAT—? But you just said—WHY THE FUCK NOT?"

"BECAUSE I SAID SO! NOW SETTLE DOWN BEFORE SOMEONE _HEARS_ US!"

In spite of his obvious indignation, Naruto huffs down into his seat, grumbling something along the lines of _so let 'em fucking hear_.

"That being said…" Sasuke continues, looking away uncomfortably, "Will you go out with me?"

And just like that Naruto was up and yelling again. "ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?"

* * *

"The truth is, I really don't like you. At all." Shino says finally and Kiba swears that his heart really has stopped.

"…Wh… What…?"

"I'm sorry if that seems terribly harsh, but I've come to the conclusion that this is the only way you'll understand."

"But…That…What…What the _hell_?" Kiba yells finally, lashing out with a wide gesture that Shino has to step back to avoid, "I mean… I… you…if you hated me that much you damn well should have _said_ something!"

Shino looks at him guardedly. "What do you think I'm doing? I would have said something sooner, but Sasuke asked me to keep you occupied while he was trying to convey his feelings to Naruto. However since that's no longer necessary—"

Kiba grits his teeth so hard Shino can hear it. "Since that's _no longer _fucking _necessary_ you figured you can finally get me out of hair, right? Yeah, well I get it! Sorry to be such a goddamn _nuisance_, you pompous asshole! Fuck you too man!"

Shoving roughly past him, Kiba storms into the building, kicking over a trashcan noisily along the way.

Shino merely shakes his head scornfully.

* * *

The sound of the front door slamming makes Tsume jump, the knife in her hand almost lopping off a finger instead of a chunk of potato.

"_Shit._ KIBA! What have I told you about not slamming the damn—"

"FUCK YOU MA! I'LL SLAM THE DAMN DOOR IF I FUCKING FEEL LIKE IT!"

"Why you little—! GET YOUR ASS BACK DOWN HERE BRAT!"

Before she even manages to put the knife down, she hears him stomp up the stairs and slam the door to his room with even more force.

"Hana—!"

"I know, I know! The whole neighborhood could probably hear you two!"

Just then the deep thrum of a bass resonates through the house and what might have been recognizable as guitar and vocals if it were about fifty decibels less loud.

"GOD DAMN IT KIBA TURN THAT SHIT DOWN OR AT LEAST USE SOME FUCKING HEADPHONES! YOUR TASTE IN MUSIC SUCKS ASS!"

* * *

**AN:** Eh he he he…

…

Please don't kill me. ._.


End file.
